Never Give Up! eh! =)

Oh great..

It's Chinese New Year's Eve. A Sunny and windy day, befitting a grand occasion like today. i believe that there are many ways for people to celebrate this day. Especially when this year's valentine's day coincides (as in same date) with CNY. I've briefly surveyed many of my friends and the respone, well.. is widely distributed. Some just want to celebrate it with their family, as in just celebrating cny, a small faction of them will want to squeeze out the night for valentine's celebration, some more sensibly will celebrate valentine's day today/some other day after valentine's day, some just aren't interested to celebrate that day for many a reasons.

For me, I haven't celebrated valentine's day in my life before. It was kinda like an irony for me, because i had the blessing to have been in relationship with 8 separate girls. It was wonderful, celebrated their bdays, my bdays, x'mas, together, but never got a chance to spend that wonderful valentine's day with anyone of them. I either broke up with them before or after the v-day or we missed that day because both parties just do not have the time. It's a shame really, because this day = national day for the expression of love to each other. And to me, it is rather elusive, exclusive and yes, by far, empty.
Maybe the one that will celebrate v-day with me, will turn out to be 'the one' , or as sze yuan put's it, ' the right right one'. Blessings are aplently in my life. I feel happy and honoured. But maybe just show me 'the right right one', i've transfer my blessings to her and my future kids.
God bless us, God bless the people around me, God bless the world. (I'm by no means a baptised christian, i'm more a buddist&christian.)

Love eludes me, and has a way of getting back at you. Haha. I can't stop laughing at my self.
Yesterday was supposed to be a meet up of old friends, as in JC classmates from 03S07 (my jc class number). As it turns out, many of them cannot make it, but at least the people that i thought would come, did came. Noah (gg back to NZ on the 26thfeb), Simon (Having exams in 3 weeks time, stressed out), Kum Fai (great philosopher as always), and yes, suprise suprise suprise.. Jasmine (back in singapore, working, starting out as an audit assistant).
I will touch base on jasmine bit more in this post, because the 3 guys, we know each other quite well.. they're great guys! And Ah kum, Remember to buy me jerseys!! haa.. i want! Noah, hope that u will enjoy the cny, although u seem rather sian bout things.. simon, wat more to say, u're the man!! Being late because u went to get the specs, and ran ALLLLL the way to get the bus.. haha.. everything i can expect of you.
Jasmine, what the fuck! yea... that was my first reaction when i got the news that she was coming. with all my auto-pilot mood and sleepy eyes, those hp numbers, they seem so familiar. (I usually just scan through sms when i am tired, to find the main point) i was to call and sms her about our whereabouts because ah kum and me had arrived. Which is wat i did, i smsed and called, no response. I saw her right after i saw noah. Which is coincident. But i am tired to probed into whatever shit tt happens to her. I just am.
And yes, for the whole gathering, i had nothing much to talk to her about. school, work, etc. All she does is just nod head after i say sth. It sucks. It is not like we didn't talk through the night before. So yea.. i guess it is how it is now.
But but but, i believe that everyone holds the same experience as i do.
As in, i will still 'care-for' the ex-gf that i have. That's natural to me. Because they meant so much to me. Which is why i was so happy, and yet distraught in a certain degree, that she is back in singapore, well and safe, probably carried back afew more pounds (if you know wat i mean..). She looks great, have a new job, starting out in her career. I am glad and happy for her.
for me.
Because after i lost contact with this person about 3 years ago(i cannot remember things more than 1 day, what makes u so sure i can rem sth 3 yrs ago), but yes, i remember that night, i received that shitty email which i still kept to remind me of that period's experience, to just have 1 tiny wish: That she is safe and sound in australia, to have a good life, to be happy, and i just want to know she is alive.

Yesterday, 12/02/2010, 730pm, city hall mrt, that was the place i saw her. And it answered all my prayers.

Thank you.

Today, 13/02/2010, i will like to set another tiny wish, since the last one is up, i just hope she get on with her current life, and wish her success in her career. She deserves it. God bless you Jasmine.

For me, I am entering the year of the Tiger in less than 12 hours time. It's, i believe a time to reprieve, reflect, redirect my life. I haven't thought much about it. But i guess, i just want to acheieve the 8 1/1/10 resolution that i set myself. That will be great enough.

Just gotta keep going at it.

Cheers,
py

posted by py @ 3:25 PM