Friday, January 21, 2011

This is a blog.
A blog filled with my feelings, raw.
Today is the last blog post of this blog.

There are so much ups and downs in my life.
I do not like some of them, but suck thumb and take it
on my chin.
I had my fair share of loving happy moments.

I have no regrets.

After i left that familiar block 148. I kept telling myself,
thank you god thank you god thank you god thank you god.
and broke down.

thank you for all that has entered my life, some stayed,
some left, some near, some far.

To remove this part of my life from me.

it requires courage.

and i decided on this, when the decision is made.

good luck to you hl.

good luck to all.

god bless.

Monday, January 17, 2011

"... but but sir, what is my KPIs?"

Sunday, January 16, 2011

When someone push me down under..
I don't see darkness, rather, i see the dark part of my life.

To keep things in perspective.
This school of thought, it's a distancing/isolating strategy.

Isolating feelings and thoughts into 2 different realms,
so that they would not interfere with each other,
and thus result in better decision making.

But, does separating the two, really give one a better perspective?
I'm unsure.

Sometimes I feel like i am collapsing into myself.

Sometimes when I/someone else push myself down under. I don't see darkness, but I see the dark part of my life.
To keep things in perspective.
This school of thought, it's a distancing/isolating strategy. Isolating feelings and thoughts into two different realms, so that they won't interfere with each other, and thus result in better decision making.
But, does separating the two, really give one a better perspective?
I am beginning to doubt myself..
Sometimes I feel like I am collapsing into myself.
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Saturday, January 15, 2011

I need to weigh my priorities..
Priorities..

u know how they stack up in py's list eh?
Mm.. then still need to weigh?

py is worried, and wants to be there for u, since he still can.
py has 17days annual leave to clear before he resigns.
Audit period is over and work isn't exactly tt heavy now..
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purpose of life?
mission of live?

Friday, January 14, 2011

yesterday was a day where i came
back home feeling good. we really stuck it out
this birthday surprise together - the guys and
abbie's help. it went well. successful.

but, all these while, i was worried
about hl's leg because it's bruised and swollen for
awhile.. and yest she can't bend it 90 degrees..

Doctor and rest the two things i can think of to
help u in healing.. maybe i'll bring u to the doctor
this coming sat/sun. rest-like really rest ur legs..
is something u need now.. but i guess its hard as
u're quite busy all the time.

then i got angry because i could not get through
to u via sms/call. that is why i felt so miserable.
i am sorry for the complaining sms sent.
i over reacted..

take care of urself and hopefully u'll feel better
today.

Thursday, January 13, 2011

Operation code name "zr_yl_bday" was a resounding success!! All thanks to marcus, loyhan, daniel, hanky! :)
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Woke up today feeling darn shitty
Slept yest night in my undies and didn't bathe. Shivering in the night.

So tired of myself.

I know myself, I need to fight for someone else. I nv fight for myself
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Wednesday, January 12, 2011

shit..

now i can't work..

Monday, January 10, 2011

diahorrea and vomit in the morning
fever that ensued when i got home
resting on the bed for the most part of the day
shivering in fever-coldness and hiding under the blankets

this was my day.

but no worries! now i am feeling better :)
think the 3 panadols helped

tomorrow is a new day! will be going to my new office at
amk. so looking forward!

welcome back to singapore jia yun!

jia you hl! unds u are so tired after work and studies..
plus u have this weekly graded assignment.. this is crazy
stuff.. jia you!!! have all the faith in you!

Sunday, January 09, 2011

I had a good day
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Friday, January 07, 2011

moving to new office on 11/1/11

packing up the office till 10/1/11

kinda looking forward to moving

Thursday, January 06, 2011

was looking through the pictures of my cdo mate on fb

he looks like he's really enjoying his life..

haha.. really happy for you bro.

i am just kinda reminded with this again by you -

take what god gives u, cherish it, believe in him

and attempt to believe in yourself.

anyways.. happy for u eugene!

Wednesday, January 05, 2011

A product that has gone through R&D cuts the age of the product to zero(ie. It is perceived as a brand new product)premium on the sale of this product is thus correspondingly acceptable.

Change: product to a person(human)

Will ppl view one in another light when one R&D oneself?
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Tuesday, January 04, 2011

I'm sitting on bus 966 now enroute from eunos to bukit panjang.
It's a journey that I usually just doze off and catch up with some sleep..
today I think I am not feeling sleepy at all. Yes, work was tiring and challenging. I'm not tired though!
I've got a pair of specs that I have looked at for 1/2 a year and I never once thought I'll own it. Now I do :)

Just feel real good now. I just didn't know what to say.

So so Looking forward to 18/1/11 when I can collect the specs. Hope u like ur jacket too hl :)
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Monday, January 03, 2011

a few things to note down in my blog before i move on to 2011

just some memories

times spent fb-msging with jia yun and time spent swimming
and chatting. the seed of service and medicine the you planted
in me when i felt i have lost it all-together after yvip2008.
Spiritually i kinda reconnected back through no fault of ur's
and i thank you for that.

times spent with hl-running, talking, shopping, helping her with
work till late night at her place/in office and sometimes at home.
buying flowers for a girl for the first time in my life and
the many mini meet ups full meets ups and impromptu meet ups
the times when i plucked up my courage to tell her how i felt and
learnt to be more patient and empathising eventhough my 1st
reaction is to push through what i want. i've grown up so much
as a person. i know i am not as good as any guy out there as i am
just weak when it comes to controlling my own emotions and being
patient.. i suck at these two.. though i try my best to be both.
sorry i have let u down many a times and thank you for your
unwavering understanding for me.
u've unknowingly drawn a huge border in the territory
of py_land and certainly left your footprints. thank you for
being you and for this new year :) stay true to yourself.
ps. speedy recovery!

my parents are great persona. although they are always tight
lipped about so many things, they let me have the space to
grow and never questions my agenda to my own life.
without this supportive culture at home, i wouldn't be who i am.
thank you.

my classmates! you guys are always there for me when i needed
you guys.. be it schoolwork, personal life, et cetera. sometimes
i drift away because i needed to.. but u know i always feel so guilty
i have to miss the many meet ups u guys put in effort to plan?
but u guys never fail to empathise.
thank you!

at my workplace - ppl that have guided me from a nobody to who
i am now - celeste (ex supervisor), yeowhwee (ex manager) and
fatimah(vp), lawrence (supervisor). i just owe it to you guys.
i understand i am not the most careful accounts staff around, but
u guys never fail to be patient with me, giving me chances after
chances to grow, pushing me to the wall to get things done.
it's challenging and that makes it really fun. :) thanks!

i've came to a stage in my life where i will need to take care of myself
and be independent, 100%.
i'm turing 25yrs in less than 4 month's time, graduating from school
in 4 month's time. In this brand new year 2011
i am taking full responsibility in my life and my partner's life (if there is one).

Saturday, January 01, 2011

running..
panting..
focus..
reaction..
impacts..
pain..
realisation..
determination..
give up?



it's a choice
you get to choose ;)