72km...next week.
Today is sunday, another dreaded sunday that i need to book in.. to where.. camp..
well.. thats life.. but at least i can wave the temptations of life goodbye.. it is crazy
to say this, but i actually is more efficent in camp. i can finish more work in camp, can
study abit more in camp, can do things really quicker.. thanks to all the orders from my
beloved sirs and yea.. the environment la.. ha.. there are not much entertainment, though
recently they craved out a recreational room for us.. okay.. lets see how much it helps la
haha.. this christmas we will be staying back in camp for 2ntm. darn suay la.. but haha..
well.. we are paid to protect the country, and i am juz 'doing my job' . . . juz hope it is
enjoyable. i have been on a long and tedious soul searching trip for a very long time...
but i feel that is coming to an end. i needed alot of help, alot of talking to, and i will wanna
say a big thank you to those that had really helped me through this period of 'soul searching'
dickson being the unwavering big bro behind me, big sis will be huixian that really helped me
to see things more realistically, and many other friends, that i forgot to mention. well.. thank you!!!
finding this new lease of life wasn't easy. haha.. i feel that my whole world, my life suddenly
stopped and i hear god's instruction to me, make sure u wake up! and know wat u are going
to do in life. and so i did.. i tried to find it.. and yea.. i found lots of answers.. i feel much much
better now. i am more motivated nowadays.
yesterday route marched from bukit panjang(my place) to jurong east. haha.. darn cool.. i feel i
still can do it.. (after one month of no training) and yea.. had dinner there b4 i marched all
the way back to bukit panjang.. of course, all these will not be possible if weida was not
on the bike and acted as a medical coverage officer.. ha.. we had alot of fun.. normal marching
speed.. talk cock.. talk about our future.. talk about girls.. talk about experiences in army, talk
about sports.. fast march.. slow march.. normal speed march.. ha.. started fast and slow by me..
cause i wanted to vary the speed and test my body's actual condition.. and yea.. i still can take it
haha.. tat made weida on the bike sweated a hell lot.. haha.. thanks bro. why am i doing this?
next wednesday, hahahaha.. guess wat, a final inclusion, me! into the company list of soldiers
marching the inaugurable 72Km route march .. haha.. man.. am i excited, at last, i think to myself
at last at last at last! i can march it, and get my red beret! after so much this year, i am going to
get it.. and be a real commando. and frm the positive result i got yesterday, i am condition
for my 72km walk le.. haha.. wish me luck guys.. and thanks weida! haha..
today is sunday,, yea.. going to go back to camp.. and tt will be not long from now.(10pm book in)
exams are almost over le, last paper being next wednesday after the route march. i wanna try
my very best in that last paper. though i know that i am really not doing very well this year.
but at least, try my best for the last paper. yea.. physics design paper.
i might not be able to go to ntu or uQueensland.. or any other super up tier uni i guess.. i know i
freaking let myself down by not able to 'fang xia' jasmine.. and stuff.. and also.. fucking so much
shit happened to me. and i wasted a hell lot of time.. procrastinating and staring into the space and
ask myself why.. why.. why? am i so unfortunate, after that knowing that it is not that i am so
unfortunate.. but am really very fortunate to have gone thru this part of mylife with jasmine,
and the joy u had brought me.. and to really juz, appreciate whatever i have now. i know i have
seriously msged a hell lot to alot of people..almost every night.. alot of girls i have msged( and i
mean really a hell lot..) i know i am irritating.. but i was juz trying my best to fang xia jasmine..
by talking to the girls.. and talking to the guys too la.. ha.. but more to girls.. i know this method
did not really worked out well.. jasmine(my classmate) got pretty pissed cause i am really
msging her too much, sokharn completely shunned me..so did cailing(my ex) heidi(my ex) yea..
i am sorry. but will like to say thank you too. at least i am feeling better now. hope u guys..and gals
will be feeling better now. that i am not msging so much.. ha..
now.. i juz want to chase all my dreams that i deem possible and am willing to chase with all my
heart and passion that is left. ha.. i will make it. now, i juz wanna concentrate on a levels, getting red beret, doing well for atec, so as to repay my unit de care and concern for letting me study for a's again.. and get my tkd coaching pass, and also to get back to sir soon, and also do volunteer work with all my heart(not girls) again.. also to learn as many things as possible. there are so many things i wanna learn.. and yep.. to plan all my adventure concerns.. all the backpacking trip.. and stuff.. haha. will wanna work hard to get to these places. and yea.. the get to a uni.. whether it is
sim.. mdis.. nie.. i wanna make up my mind and do well in it.
that will be more like me.
and not the me that needed a girl to be behind me so that i can dump all my emotional feelings with.
that is me. the me now. with no girls ba.
ha.. think tt will be better.
and yea.. thats all..
god bless everyone i know.. amen.
peng yong
posted by py @ 5:09 PM
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